Today is Turkey Day, and that means…well…hardly anybody is reading this blog or The 2025 PopCult Gift Guide right now. Seriously, yesterday so many people across the country got half a day off that our readership plummetted right around noon.

So, as we have done in previous years, to honor the holiday and also so we don’t squander any good gift suggestions, today we’re going to offer up our own style of Turkey–god-awfully goofy gifts that could be gag gifts, or white elephant gifts, or even gifts that might gag a white elephant.

These gifts are either amusing or disturbing, and you might want to think long and hard before actually wrapping any of these and putting them under the tree. Either make sure that the recipient has a great sense of humor, or is at least somebody you won’t mind antagonizing. Some are annoying. Some are disgusting. Some look edible but are still gross. To be honest, this year’s gift ideas are actually pretty cool, aside from being goofy.

My descriptions will be short and brutally honest. Also, there are five picks today. This is the only entry in The 2025 PopCult Gift Guide today. We will be back tomorrow with a PopCulteer devoted to Small Business Day, plus an entry that will recommend a couple of great local restaurants. If you’ve been scoring at home, note that this year I decided to extend the Gift Guide by four days, with our Master List hitting a week from tomorrow.

In each item there will also be a link to the website from which you can find these memorable and offbeat gift ideas. .

Happy Turkey Day, everybody. Maybe be thankful that you don’t get any gifts like this. Unless they look really cool to you. Then make sure to forward a link to this post to everybody you know.

The first pick in this year’s Turkey Day gift suggestions is, I have to admit, actually pretty cool. This would be a great gift for any die-hard fan of John Waters, but for people who are maybe not fans of his work, this could be the ultimate prank gift.

It’s the John Waters action figure!

It’s costs $29.99, plus shipping from Good Taste Toys (of course) and you can order it in two styles, one of which seems to come and go from the website. So stick with the pink suit version.

This was the inaugural product from Good Taste Toys, and here’s what they have to say abou it:

Good Taste Toys launches with a bang, and the most perfect subject to show what this line is all about – JOHN WATERS!

With his rightful star on the Hollywood walk of fame, the legendary purveyor of all things trashy on the silver screen has been “zapped” down to a “teensy” size for you to display.

Complete with packaging reminiscent of his classic film Pink Flamingos – but for those new to JSD figures, he can be taken out of and returned to the packaging.

Celebrate this filthy genius with your own JOHN WATERS, and thank you for getting on board with GOOD TASTE TOYS!

13.5cm tall soft vinyl figure with posable arms.

Be advised, these are shipping from Australia, so you want to order soon.

Next up is a gift for the opera fan, but they might find it a little corny.

Opera Corn, from Archie McPhee, is just that. It’s an ear of corn that sings opera!

This is a 6-1/4″ tall, plastic ear of corn (batteries included)that sings opera at the push of a button. It comes pre-shucked and has a voice that can fill a hall.

As the experts at Archie McPhee say:

THAT CORN SINGS OPERA

Opera Corn is the starch that can sing. In fact, it creams the competition! When it comes to an a-maize-ing aria, we’re all ears! This electronic Opera Corn sings when you press the button! Figaro! Figaro! It’s a hard vinyl ear of corn that is 6-1/4″ tall that produces one of five ear-resistable operatic sounds at the push of a button. It’s a regular Luciano Cobarotti. You wouldn’t expect such highbrow music from corn, but we went against the grain.

With such a beautiful voice, your giftee will think you spent weeks finding this lovely Aria of Corn, instead of just cobbling together a gift without a kernal of effort.

It’s $12.95 (plus shipping) at Archie McPhee.

Check out the video…

So the opera wasn’t fancy enough for you, huh? Well, if you want to give a gift that absolutely screams “CLASS,” you can’t go wrong by pulling something out of Uranus!

A longtime PopCult Favorite, Uranus, Missouri is world famous for their fudge factory, nuts, Putt-Pirate Mini Golf and other attractions, but this gift idea is for a piece of apparel that you can wear anywhere.

Seriously, your giftee can wear the Uranus Liquors shirt to university lectures, formal weddings, church and super-dignified White House functions. People will take one look at this shirt and know that the person wearing it is an ultra-sophisticated man (or woman) about town who can hobknob with ambassadors, senators, presidents and popes.

You can order the Uranus Liquors T Shirt directly from Uranus, Missouri.

Next up we have a cookbook. Now, everybody loves chicken, so this really shouldn’t be controversial at all.

100 Ways To Eat Cock
by Modern Classics
Independently Published
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 979-8424797279
$9.99

Who wouldn’t love to have 100 pages of great poultry recipes?

Well…that’s not what your giftee will get. This is a blank book. It’s a journal.

However, it has a very memorable cover and title, and nobody says that you can’t fill it with your own recipes.

Or it can be filled with re-written lyrics to Paul Simon’s “50 Ways To Leave Your Lover.”

Just imagine walking into church, proudly wearing your Uranus Liquors shirt, and handing this to the Pastor as a gift.

People will shower you with admiration. Or they may pelt you with rocks and garbage. Six of one, half a dozen of the other.
You can order this from Amazon. .

Finally we have another action figure. This time it’s the super fighting figure that every kid today wants to have.

I’m talking of course, about the Lenny Bruce action figure from Nacelle.

What could wouldn’t want to have the influential stand-up comedian from the 1960s offer up biting satirical comments that will shock their other action figures with their sharp edge and daring language?

Here’s the quick history, from Nacelle’s website:

Lenny Bruce’s open, free-style and critical form of comedy catapulted him into legendary status as a comedic pioneer that showcased satire, politics, religion, sex, and vulgarity in his act. Lenny’s 1964 conviction in an obscenity trial was followed by a posthumous pardon, the first in New York State history, by then-Governor George Pataki in 2003. He paved the way for future outspoken counterculture-era comedians, and his trial for obscenity is seen as a landmark for freedom of speech in the United States. On February 3, 1961, in the midst of a severe blizzard, he gave a famous performance at Carnegie Hall in New York. It was recorded and later released as a three-disc set, titled The Carnegie Hall Concert.

Kids can have Lenny onstage, using words that society in general does not like, and then they can send Batman and Spider-man in to arrest him!

You can order the Lenny Bruce action figure directly from Nacelle, where it is currently on sale for a mere eighteen bucks. Or you can get a bundle that includes the figure plus a vinyl LP.

And those are our Turkey Day gift ideas.

Now go back to the kitchen. Your stove top stuffing is burning.