I don’t quite know how to describe this one. Moose Toys has a new product and it’s being heavily-promoted. They’ve already paid to have it placed on “hot toys” lists (You didn’t think those were real lists, did you?) and there will be a major television ad campaign. Press releases have been flying out over the last few weeks.
Folks, meet “Gotta Go Flamingo,” an incontinent flamingo who REALLY POOPS!
I’ll just copy and paste the press release here:
Moose Toys continues to dominate the youth electronics aisle with the debut of Gotta Go Flamingo. Sherbet is an interactive, potty-trained flamingo who loves to sing, dance, chat back, eat and poop in a special toilet. Simply feed Sherbet his magical flamingo food and watch his neck wiggle as he gobbles it down. You know when it’s time for Sherbet to go because he sings a signature “Uh Oh, Gotta Go!” jingle and poops into the bowl. Gotta Go Flamingo features hilarious movements, sounds and reactions and fosters repeat play so you can “do-do” it all over again once he is done. Gotta Go Flamingo has already been named one of the top 12 toys for Christmas 2020 by leading U.K. retailer Argos, and global production is at full capacity due to high demand.
When I was a kid, I thought part of the appeal of owning a robot pet in the far-away future would be that they wouldn’t poop. I guess I was mistaken. Apparently poop is one of the great joys of pet ownership.
I can only imagine the pitch meeting where this toy was conceived: “I got it! Kids love flamingos, and kids love poop! Why don’t we combine those two things into one toy?”
Now, since a flamingo with magic pooping abilities might not have a lot of repeat play value, Sherbet, the Gotta Go Flamingo will also repeat what you say. I’m guessing here that at some point in the design process someone got confused and thought that flamingos were like parrots or something. At least they included a nicely surreal image to illustrate the point (seen left).
In the normal play mode, you feed Sherbet the special food, and then the bird takes a dump, and then…and this is something that isn’t mentioned in the press release…you can recycle the food. I don’t think this is really a lesson you want a kid to learn, but it did lead to this very disturbing image included in the press material…
Gotta Go Flamingo is already on store shelves and is available online for under thirty bucks from several retailers.
There is so much wrong about that last image that I don’t even know where to begin…
It won’t last. It’s a goner the first time some kids eats the flamingo food and chokes.