According to Reuters, Boston police today spent much of the afternoon dealing with a hoax that saw “devices” around the city suspected of being bombs. One was even detonated. It was while the police were in a panic and all the cable news channels were devoting their airtime to the situation that somebody noticed that these “devices” bore the image of The Mooninites, from Adult Swim’s popular “Aqua Teen Hunger Force” cartoon.
The Mooninites are invaders from the Moon who treat everyone with condescension and disrespect. They encourage the impressionable Meatwad to drink, smoke, and shoplift. Also, they look like bad Atari videogame characters, circa 1980. The Mooninites also like to give the finger a lot.
It turns out that the devices are little magnetic light-up signs that promote “ATHF” and the upcoming movie based on the hit animated series. Turner broadcasting has fessed up. However, Turner-owned CNN apparently didn’t recognize that they were part of the media conglomerate responsible for paralyzing Boston.
We can rest easy in our beds tonight, content with the knowledge that our country is in safe hands. The signs have been up in ten cities for two to three weeks. If it were indeed a terrorist plot, then they would evidently only have two or three weeks to attack before our alert National Security Forces managed to stop them.
At least they’re protecting us from The Mooninites. Those guys are always up to no good.
UPDATE: It’s the following morning, and it looks like the city of Boston is intent on compounding their error by pursuing charges. They’ve arrested two of the independent artists who were hired to install the signs, and they say they plan to pursue charges against the persons “in the boardroom at Turner” who approved the ad campaign. It has not yet dawned on them that they have made Boston a laughing stock of the country. No word yet on what has the Boston officials more outraged–the fact that they threw their city into a panic and terrorized their own citizens over an obvious advertising campaign, or the fact that said campaign, which they felt was a terrorist threat, was installed and in place for more than two weeks before the crack Boston anti-terror squad noticed them. At least the cops in NYC are hip enough to recognize Ignignok from the Mooninites.